You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
