Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
