Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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