Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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