i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
