For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
So squirting runs in the family.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize