Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
