im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
