Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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