No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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