i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
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