College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Randomize