i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
