oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
He felt like a one man threesome
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
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