Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
