you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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