So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize