if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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