Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize