Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
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