Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize