oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
