Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
