Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
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And the cops told us we were all naked.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
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tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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