All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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