You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize