respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
