Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
