I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
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