using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
