i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
