You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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