I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
wow bdsm is so cute
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
