if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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