apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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