I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize