She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
