He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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