We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
BRING THE BAGELS
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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