Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Randomize
