I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize