69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
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