hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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