Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
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The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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