its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
