How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
