so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
This is my life. Enjoy the view
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
