So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I think my vagina is haunted
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
