Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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