You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize