no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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